The excitement of a first international meeting gave way to confusion on the latest episode of 90 Day Fiancé: Before the 90 Days. After weeks of online connection, Laura Nevenner finally met Birkan in Turkey. While their first hug was promising, their first night together left Laura questioning everything about their relationship. She repeatedly described his unusual behavior as feeling “off” and wondered if he was no longer attracted to her in person.
Laura’s High Hopes for Meeting Birkan in Turkey
Laura, a 47-year-old fifth-grade teacher and romance novel enthusiast from Washington, met the 26-year-old Turkish man on Snapchat. They bonded quickly online, with Laura describing Birkan as having a “dark romance, male main character” aesthetic and feeling like “the man of my dreams”.
She flew to Turkey with plans to meet her online boyfriend for the first time, calling him the “love of her life” ahead of the trip. However, her parents were deeply skeptical. After learning about the twenty-year age gap, her mother expressed major concerns about Birkan’s intentions.
“Oh, my God! Laura, are you serious? He wants a ticket to America. That’s what I think he is thinking. He doesn’t love you. That’s not what love is,” Laura’s mother stated.
The First Meeting and Initial Red Flags
When Laura and Birkan finally met at the airport, their first moments together seemed positive. They shared a long hug, and Laura told the cameras, “He looks amazing”. Birkan also expressed happiness, saying, “She is perfect… I am complete”. They spent part of their first day exploring local architecture in Turkey, which Laura enjoyed.
However, an underlying tension began to surface. Before Laura’s arrival, Birkan had confided in friends about his financial struggles, revealing that his businesses had failed and he was having trouble finding work. He was also aware of and bothered by Laura’s extremely close friendship with her best friend, Michael.
The Awkward First Night That Felt “Off”
The couple’s dynamic shifted noticeably when they returned to the Airbnb Laura had booked for the night. Exhausted from her journey, Laura told Birkan she needed sleep and asked if he wanted to go to bed. Birkan responded that she should sleep, and he would watch TV, adding that he would join her “after”.
This decision confused and concerned Laura. Instead of spending their first night together talking or connecting, Birkan stayed in the living room. Laura went to the bedroom alone and spoke to the cameras about her disappointment.
“Him just staying out there watching TV? It’s just, I don’t know…different than what I was expecting. I feel like it’s not like this super great magical moment. Just feels off. I don’t know how to explain it. Just feels off,” Laura said.
She speculated about several reasons for his distance, wondering if he was hiding something or was simply not attracted to her in person. Laura described the situation as “very awkward”.
Michael’s Messages Add to the Tension
Complicating the evening were continuous text messages from Laura’s best friend, Michael. Laura revealed that Michael had tracked her flight and texted her as soon as she landed. She texted him back saying everything was good, but he replied that her tone seemed “less than excited”.
The timing of Michael’s attention highlighted the disconnect Laura was feeling with Birkan. She found it ironic and concerning that she was receiving more attentive communication from her friend back home than from the man she had traveled across the world to meet.
“It is so ironic and kind of concerning that I am receiving more attention from Michael than from the man I flew halfway across the world to meet. I am just kind of questioning why I am here at this point,” Laura confessed.
Birkan’s Concerns About Laura’s Friendship
The issue of Michael is not one-sided. In a separate conversation, Birkan had already expressed serious discomfort with Laura’s close bond with her best friend. He viewed their friendship as inappropriate for a serious romantic relationship.
“They do everything together, and sometimes she even compares me to him. This is what I am afraid of. It’s just totally unacceptable to me. I want her to end the friendship,” Birkan stated.
This demand presents a significant point of conflict. Birkan has admitted he does not trust Michael. Laura, however, has previously acknowledged that many people assume she and Michael are a couple and has speculated that his feelings for her might be more than platonic.
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Fan Reactions to Laura and Birkan’s Storyline
Viewers of the show have been vocal on social media about Laura and Birkan’s relationship, particularly their age difference. Many fans on X have criticized Laura’s perspective, with some calling her “delusional” for believing a much younger man she met online is the love of her life.
Other fan comments have focused on the practical challenges, like what the couple would talk about, and have sided with Laura’s mother about the potential for Birkan to be seeking a path to America. The preview for the upcoming Episode 4 suggests the awkwardness continues, with Laura feeling that something is wrong and questioning if Birkan is attracted to her at all.
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