Ejae, the singer behind the hit song “Golden” from the Netflix animated film KPop Demon Hunters, has recently spoken about her time as a trainee at SM Entertainment in South Korea. She spent nearly 11 years training to become a K-pop idol, but the experience came with many strict rules that affected her daily life and mental health. Ejae shared these details in interviews with The Sunday Times Style Magazine and other media outlets.
The singer, who is now 34 years old, trained at one of the biggest K-pop entertainment companies in the world. She joined SM Entertainment when she was just 11 years old. Her dream was to become a K-pop star, but the path was not easy. She had to follow many rules about her appearance, food, and even small habits like chewing gum.
Ejae’s story has gained attention because she is now a global star. She won a Grammy and an Oscar for the song “Golden”. Fans are very interested in her journey from a young trainee to an award-winning artist.
The Rules That Shaped Ejae’s Training Years
Ejae revealed that trainees at SM Entertainment had to follow very specific rules. One of the most surprising rules was about chewing gum. She said that trainers believed chewing gum could make a person’s jaw look bigger. Because of this, trainees were not allowed to chew gum.
She also talked about how trainees had to practice their facial expressions. They would smile in front of a mirror while holding a ChapStick under their nose. This was done to train the facial muscles and improve face shape. Ear piercings were also not allowed.
The food rules were very strict as well. Ejae said trainees could not drink sodas or eat greasy food. They had to stay “unbloated and fit” at all times. Looking back, she said this was not a healthy way to live, especially for a teenager.
“We couldn’t chew gum because it would make your jaws bigger. We would have to smile in front of the mirror with a ChapStick here because it makes your muscles grow and your face shape. We couldn’t have ear piercings. It was very much no sodas, no greasy food, keeping yourself unbloated and fit. I wouldn’t say it was healthy. Let’s just be real. It’s very ambitious for a teenager.”
Weekly Weigh-Ins and Public Criticism
Another difficult part of Ejae’s training was the weekly weigh-ins. Every week, trainees had to stand on a scale in front of everyone, including male trainees. Their weight was announced out loud for everyone to hear. This caused a lot of stress and shame for young trainees.
Ejae said she was around 170 centimeters tall during her teenage years, which made her taller than some of the male trainees. Because she was taller, her weight was higher, and she often received criticism. The company would link weight directly to being “fat”. Even normal things like growing up, swelling, or baby fat were criticized.
These experiences left deep emotional scars. Ejae said she still sees a therapist to deal with the trauma from her trainee days. She explained that many people think time heals all wounds, but that is not always true. The shame and pressure she felt as a teenager still affect her today.
Learning to Be a Pop Star From a Young Age
Ejae’s training was not just about singing and dancing. She also had to learn how to pose for photos, do photoshoots, and answer interview questions. Every month, trainees had a photoshoot to practice posing. They also had to learn multiple languages, including Chinese, because the company knew China would be a big market for K-pop.
The training was very intense. Ejae said she “worked her a*s off” during those years. She described the experience as difficult but also said she learned a lot. She was always the first to arrive and the last to leave.
Despite all her hard work, Ejae was dropped from the trainee program when she was 23 years old. She was told that her voice did not fit and that she did not have the right image. After 11 years of preparation, her dream of becoming a K-pop idol ended in just a few seconds.
“They said my voice didn’t fit and I didn’t have the image. Eleven years of preparation ended in just two seconds. The blow was devastating. I stayed home crying for weeks.”
Dealing With Sasaeng Harassment as a Young Trainee
Ejae also spoke about the dangers of sasaeng fans, who are obsessive fans that cross boundaries. She said that when she and other trainees left the SM Entertainment building at night, sasaengs would throw trash at them. They would call the trainees horrible names and curse at them.
One incident stood out to her. A sasaeng told her, “You better not mess with our boys or flirt with them, or I will kill you”. Ejae was only 12 years old at the time. She said hearing a threat like that as a child was very intense.
This experience inspired the song “Your Idol” from KPop Demon Hunters. The song has a dark and eerie tone that reflects the darker side of fandom culture. Ejae said the concept of idolizing someone never made sense to her because of what she went through.
Finding a New Path in Songwriting
After being dropped from SM Entertainment, Ejae did not give up on music. She started making beats and exploring the SoundCloud scene. She also began recording soundtracks for Korean dramas. This helped her meet other songwriters who encouraged her.
Ejae said she had to be realistic with herself about whether she actually wanted to be a singer. She saw her friends debut in the K-pop industry and realized that it was not as glamorous as it looked from the outside. Songwriting became her new focus.
Her first big break came when she wrote the song “Hello,” which was picked up by South Korean singer Hani. In 2019, she wrote “Psycho” for Red Velvet, which topped the Billboard world digital song chart. This success opened many doors for her.
From Trainee to Oscar Winner
Ejae’s career reached new heights when she became the singing voice of Rumi in KPop Demon Hunters. The film became Netflix’s most-watched movie ever, with over 300 million views. The song “Golden” spent eight weeks at No. 1 on the Billboard Hot 100.
She also won a Grammy and an Oscar for the song. This made her the first artist linked to K-pop to win both awards. Her journey from a rejected trainee to an award-winning artist has inspired many people.
Ejae said that her time as a trainee, while painful, helped her grow as an artist. She does not take the rejection personally anymore. She believes everything happens for a reason. Music saved her, and she found her voice through songwriting.
“I spent my youth as a trainee, and when debut fell through, it hurt a lot. But what matters is how you work through that pain. I didn’t take the rejection personally. It was SM’s call, and there’s a time for everything. The important thing was that I kept growing.”
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The Lasting Impact of Trainee Life
Ejae’s story is important because it shows the dark side of the K-pop training system. Many young people dream of becoming K-pop idols, but the reality can be very difficult. The strict rules, public criticism, and pressure to look a certain way can cause lasting mental health problems.
Ejae still sees a therapist to deal with the trauma from her trainee days. She has spoken openly about her experiences to help others understand the costs of the K-pop dream. Her honesty has started important conversations about mental health in the entertainment industry.
She is now engaged to music producer Sam Kim and is planning to get married in November 2026. Despite her success, she has not forgotten the struggles she faced as a young trainee. Her story is a reminder that success does not erase past pain, but it can help heal it.
Also Read: ‘KPop Demon Hunters’ Star Arden Cho Marries Christopher Lee in Dreamy Florence Wedding
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